Saturday, October 9, 2010

How did this get here?

Well, for starters, this blog is about tomboys. I'm using the word "tomboy" as a short term to describe a lot of different women -- boyish girls, tough women, crossdressers and drag kings, reverse traps, crossplayers, even "fakebois". 
 
This site was sparked by an attempt to analyze yaoi and its impact on women and their gender identities. It was also largely inspired by the presence of various yaoi-flavored "fakeboi" profiles on certain websites -- "fakebois" essentially being reverse-traps or pre-hormonal FtMs who simply pick a boys' name and create a fictional profile around it, featuring pictures of themselves dressed as their male alter-ego. It's nothing to get worked up over, but having met some of these people IRL, sometimes there are issues there that need to be addressed.
 

All I'm trying to do is help people get their heads sorted -- I provide the information, you make the choice. I really also mean to tell people that they're not alone, they're not crazy, and they're hardly as weird as they think they are. I'm not trying to perpetuate hate or misinformation against any specific group or kind of person. 
 

If you're just reaching this blog for the first time and wondering where to begin, I recommend starting with my essay about girls who want to become boys. Sound like you? Better CLICK HERE to start reading.


CLICK HERE for FAQ and a list of some of the terms I'm using, or if you have questions after reading my essay.


If you're already a tomboy (or a fan of them) CLICK HERE for some sweet pictures and CLICK HERE for some style inspiration. CLICK HERE for an (under-construction) list of some real-life awesome tomboys and CLICK HERE to get a list of some of my favorite movies, books and shows that focus on tomboys.


Last but not least, CLICK HERE for a little bit about me, or to contact me about the blog. I'm always interested in feedback.


- Sho (bifauxnen@hotmail.com)

16 comments:

  1. I fucking love you for doing this, Sho. You are now one of my Internet Idols. Keep being fucking awesome.

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  2. I have a commenter :D

    And thanks, I'm flattered! Assuming you're one of the people I was talking with on /cgl/, where do you think this site needs to go? If I could identify a fakeboi group/forum somewhere I could (nicely) contribute a link to here, but I've never heard of such a forum.

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  3. Fuck yeah, finally checked out this blog and may I say it's awesome?
    Yes, go ahead me- It's fucking awesome.

    Regarding your question about a fakeboi forum though, the only thing I can really think of would be deviantart. Maybe get an account and post on the boi's walls being friendly and have your signature read something along the lines of,
    "Having possible gender issues? Are you a girl that wants to be a boy? Do you like yaoi? Then click here!" and have a link of this blog under it?

    Anyway, changing the subject up a bit but I recently came across a yuri manga that's still publishing (slowly, may I add.) called "Renai Idenshi XX". It's filled with tomboys and the main couple are both reverse traps. It's the only yuri series I know like that so I thought I would mention it.

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  4. Oh god, this blog is so needed it's not even funny. Yaoi forums would be optimal to spread the word on.

    I can't view all the categories, are they still under construction? I'm looking forward to read more.

    Love, a tomboy

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  5. Thanks for the comments, everyone :)

    I joined dA as 'Sho-XX' if anyone on dA wants to find me. I think this was an excellent suggestion -- I'm going to comment on other tomboy/fakeboi deviations/profiles with the blog in my signature. Nothing forceful or rude, just so people who might be interested in reverse-trapping or wondering if they're trans can read it.

    I'm adding content but many portions of the site are under construction still, sorry! (Also, I've heard "Love DNA XX" described as "Code Geass with lesbians" and I have NO problem with this :D Thanks for recommending, I'll add it to the Books/Movies section!)

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  6. I can't speak as a Yaoi/pretty boy lover (I thought every fangirl had to be a closet lesbian lol), but as a former FTM-IDed young woman: you rock. There is a desperate need of what you're doing and frankly I'm surprised you're the first person I've seen to analyze the mindset implied by most yaois and its repercussions on female fans. Please keep writing, I'll always support you and other tomboys questioning the WHYS many people want to go the transgender route

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  7. Thank you for your support, Bluetraveler :)

    I only started trying to analyze the "bishounen-wannabe" phenomenon after I realized how widespread it was -- I personally experienced virtually everything described here (including identifying as FtM) before I realized what was wrong, but I always assumed I was an isolated case.

    And of course the goal is NOT to get all FtMs to stop transitioning -- but if I'd known now what I didn't realize a couple years ago, it would have saved me a lot of frustration. I just want tomboys/reverse-traps to know they don't have to change a thing and are awesome the way they are.

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  8. I've made a blog now, it's this one : http://questioningtranssexuality.blogspot.com/2010/10/for-starters.html . I'd very much like to advertise yours, even though I don't have any followers at the moment. Can I?

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  9. I am also a tomboy, at least I think I am much more of a tomboy than a girlie girl. The only problem was that I was born a boy...

    Great site. Liked it alot. Being trans is hard... :-/

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  10. This is an awesome idea.
    Fuck Sho, you're awesome. Good luck with the possible soon-to-be's.

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  11. Girlie girl....sounds very stupid. There is no law of nature that a girl has to be feminine and other crap. Just be yourself no matter when people say "Girls don't do this, girl have to be like that..."

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  12. Hoping for more updates from you Sho :) I look forward to see the Books and Movies category.

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  13. I also look forward to more updates.

    (Oh, and Love DNA XX is awesome.)

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  14. Hey Sho, my "bishie" posts are still the most viewed of my blog. Looks like there's very much a need for what you are doing. If you want me to compile some lists on worthwile anime / shows with "weird" female characters just ask me.

    As for what happened at Susan's: I'm sorry you had to be dragged with me in the "transphobia" craze. I am not saying no one should ever transition. But just a few days ago I received a mail from another female who started T and stopped; she said that if there had been more info on how to be female and be "tomboy/"masculine"/butch/bishie*/whateverisnotbarbie" (which is simple, just be) she would have never started. You might want to see the post I did on Khaos Komix for this matter, it really is something you would be interested about I bet.

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  15. Sorry to double-post, but your blog got me thinking again and so I made this post:

    http://questioningtranssexuality.blogspot.com/2011/01/how-to-become-bishie-in-few-easy-steps.html

    Maybe you could add something more about it as a professional "bifauxnen" : )

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  16. I just spent a long time going through this whole site.

    It's like you were speaking to me directly. Like you KNOW me completely, everything about me. Every fiber of my brain that makes me tick.

    I sat around thinking about all this for hours and hours. And I came to some conclusions, and at the same time, in some ways, I'm more confused than ever.

    But there is something I want to say with all seriousness and absolutely no doubt:

    You have helped me.

    Perhaps you haven't saved my life, as I wanted to tell you at first. But you have made it so much better.

    There IS hope. Maybe I can't be that perfect idealization...but I don't have to loathe my existence either.

    It's amazing how simple some concepts are and how we can totally miss them somehow. The idea of just BEING yourself, male, female, fuck-all aside is so foreign to people, and it eludes me often as well. But what you did is give me a glimpse of that again, as if I had forgotten it all along. I think maybe we put so much emphasis on the sexuality of it. I mean, the actual ACT of sex - having a dick or a vagina and using said mechanics...when it's not really about that. Not entirely anyways. What happens during a roll in bed shouldn't define you or your identity, or even your gender, should it?

    Sure I can't REALLY be a boy. But I can be me. And only I can define that. I can make that whatever the fuck I want to, physically and mentally.

    Thank you. So much. Thank you for making me think. I know I'll always struggle with the dysphoria side of things, but I feel like I'm suffocating 50% less now. And that's an amazing gift.

    And to know that I'm not alone, not at all, that's even better.

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